


Aberration

by Souliebird



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman Beyond
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-21
Updated: 2014-11-21
Packaged: 2018-02-26 11:48:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2650922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Souliebird/pseuds/Souliebird
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a merger of universes, a look into the aftermath of the Joker's death from Tim Drake's hands and the return of Jason Todd.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aberration

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place in a weird convergence of universes of the comics, Batman Beyond: The Return of The Joker, and the animated Batman: Under The Red Hood.

When Tim looked down at his hands, half the time he thought they were still caked with white make up. The first few times Tim had this hallucination, he had scrubbed his hands under hot water until they were raw and pink. He had given up trying to wash it off every time he saw it, as he had learned that he would just make who ever found him upset. 

Tim had broken multiple mirrors around the Manor to the point any remaining mirrors had been taken down or covered with black cloth. At first, Alfred had used a royal purple cloth that Tim would have found beautiful before. But now Tim hated the color purple. He had gone into a fit of rage when he saw the cloth and had ripped it up and smashed the mirror it hid. Bruce had found Tim, sitting in the shards and sobbing. Tim looked smaller than ever. He gathered Tim into his arms and took him down to the kitchen to care for the boy's hands. 

They never scolded Tim when he acted out. Everyone understood all to well what Tim had gone through. Three weeks of Joker induced torture, followed by Tim aiming a gun at Batman, only to shoot the Joker instead, killing him. They all believed Tim had been insane at the time, had no control over himself, and that all of this acting out was him trying to deal from what had happened to him. 

But the cold hard truth was that Tim knew exactly what he had been doing. 

It hadn't been an attempt to save Batman's life. Tim knew if that he hadn't have pulled the trigger, Batman could have overpowered the Joker and would have taken him to Arkham where he belonged. It had been revenge, for all the things the Joker had inflected upon Batman over the years. Hearing Batman whisper “Tim?” in such a hurt tone had been too much. There had been too much pain and Tim needed it to end. He knew Batman could never be the one to take the step over the line, but Tim could do it. Tim could do it for Batman. For Bruce. And he had. 

When Bruce told him he could no longer be Robin, Tim accepted it easily. Tim had broken the cardinal rule and deserved the consequences. He knew, in some part of his mind, that Bruce had been trying to protect him, but it still felt like a punishment. 

Batman said he no longer wanted a Robin to work with, but Damian protested too much and had lashed out. He had convinced his father that the there had only been one major threat to the Robins and it had been taken care of. The Joker had been the one to kill Jason Todd and the one to hurt Tim. The fighting went on for weeks before Damian took things into his own hands and created his own Robin costume. 

Batman gave in, and after a year of working alone once again, Batman had another Robin.

Tim wanted to be angry over it, but he of all people knew Batman needed a Robin. He had seen first had what happened when Batman worked alone and in anger. It was how he had become Robin himself. 

Tim still liked to sneak out and take photographs of Batman and Robin. He knew Bruce would be furious if he found out Tim was following them at night, only a breaths away from danger, but photography was the only thing he had that was his own now. It was the one thing that kept Tim from going insane again. 

That is how he first saw the new figure in Gotham; through the lens of his camera. Tim snapped a picture, then canted his head. He'd never seen a villain use a grappling hook to get around. The figure was following Batman and Robin around the city, but was making no moves to interact. He seemed to just be watching the Dynamic Duo, just as Tim was. 

When Tim left to return to the Manor, the figure was still following along behind Batman. Tim didn't notice the figure look directly towards him as Tim got out his own hook and sailed away.

Neither Batman or Robin mentioned the new figure around Tim, so Tim guessed that they were not aware of him yet. What they discussed was the fact someone was making moves in the Gotham City drug trade and a war seemed to be brewing between Black Mask and the unknown player. And this unknown player was very willing to use deadly force when confronted. Tim debated telling Bruce about the figure he had seen, but ultimately decided against it, as it would mean admitting he had been following them on patrol. 

The figure with the red helmet and brown leather jacket followed Batman and Robin night after night and Tim found himself photographing them more than his original subjects. There was something very familiar about his movements, but Tim could not place it. 

Tim had been getting ready to turn in for the night, when Batman suddenly took off from one of his perches. Tim took his camera back out and followed, careful to stay far enough back he wouldn't be seen, but close enough that he wouldn't lose track. 

Batman landed in an empty lot that wasn't so empty. The figure that had been following Batman and Robin the past few nights was in the lot, along with four other people, who were wearing similar suits. Words were exchanged, then fighting began. Tim took up his camera and focused on getting shots of Batman's new shadow in action. Until one figure's head exploded and the fight ended. Tim almost dropped his camera in shock. The red helmeted figure had killed without hesitation. It sent a shiver through Tim. 

He ran back to the Manor, wanting to forget the sight of blood splashed against the brick wall. 

Nightwing joined the patrol the next night and Tim made sure to keep himself tucked into shadows even more than usual. The group had a tendency to split up and Tim did not want to get caught. 

Tim did not need to think about who to follow when Nightwing flew one way and Robin disappeared into shadows. Batman was always Tim's main focus for the photographs...at least he was now. Before Tim had become Robin, he had loved to photograph his predecessor, imaging what it would be like to be him. Tim always felt guilty when he thought of it, because his dream had come at much too high of cost. 

The figure, Red Hod as Batman had called him but Tim thought the name was kind of lame, appeared again and not at all hidden from view. Trying to steal a helicopter was not subtle. Tim watched through his lens as the scene unfolded, only missing moments when he snapped a picture. His chest felt tight as Batman dove off the roof to save the street below from being crushed by the now damaged helicopter. Tim didn't know he was holding his breath until Nightwing scooped Batman off the taut line that secured the helicopter inches above cars. 

More running would follow and Tim had to plan as he ran, trying to keep parallel to the action and take pictures at the same time.

Tim had almost shot off his grappling hook, preparing to fly down to the train station, when something grabbed him from behind. Tim was yanked down just as the explosion went off. 

“Oooohhh. Father is going to be so angry with you, Drake.” 

~*~

“Timothy Jackson Drake!” Tim did not fail to notice that his adopted name was left off. “Please try to explain to me what the hell you were thinking going out there! You could have been killed!” 

“I...” Tim could not even look at Bruce. He seemed so angry and disappointed; Tim always had issues with disappointing people. “I was just taking pictures.” 

“You were just taking pictures? You were putting yourself into danger, Tim! Did you even stop to think about that?! If Damian hadn't stopped you, you would have flown right into that explosion!” Bruce's yelling was echoing through out the cave and it just made Tim feel that much worse. He kept his head down, staring at his shoes. He cringed a bit when he saw that his hand had gone white. He had disappointed Bruce, again. Tim was nothing but a disappointment. 

“I'm sorry...I didn't think.” 

“That's right, you didn't think.” Bruce sighed and Tim could tell from the shadows Bruce was pinching the bridge of his nose. “How long have you been following us?” 

Tim peeked up at the question, surprised by it. “A...a few weeks. Maybe like three months, I think.” Bruce's lips twitched and the motion contradicted the worry in his eyes. 

“I never noticed. You've always been a master of stealth, Tim.” Tim clung to the praise. He needed it so desperately, and it was so rarely given now a days. At least in the ways that mattered to Tim. 

Tim was still grounded, though. He was allowed out on the grounds during the day, but that was it. He could not leave the property. At night, Alfred checked every hour to make sure Tim was still there. Tim hated it. 

Tim managed to talk Alfred into letting him come down into the Cave, because it was still technically on the property and Bruce had never explicitly said he wasn't allowed down there. It had just been heavily implied. 

Tim liked feeding the bats. He wondered if Alfred ever fed them, as he had never seen it. Maybe they had some sort of feeding station, somewhere. The bats could be very friendly, when they were shown the humans that had invaded their space posed no threats to them. They would land on Tim's arms and nuzzle his hands, sniffing out the food he had for them. Watching the bat on his arm brought a very rare smile to Tim's lips. 

“Bollocks!” The bat took off from Tim's arms at Alfred's exclamation. Tim headed towards the main computer to see what was wrong, hoping it was something that wouldn't cause Alfred to send him upstairs. Alfred was shaking his ear piece with an annoyed look. “It cut out!” Tim took the piece from Alfred and looked it over.

“The battery is dying.” Alfred still looked annoyed. “I'll get you a new one...” Tim went to go search the drawers and noise filled the cave as Alfred turned the speakers on. Whatever was happening with Batman, Alfred did not want to be left out of the loop.

“Jason, wait! Jason!” Batman was yelling.

Tim hurried back to the computers without the batteries and looked up at the screen. Batman was chasing the Red Hood. Tim felt his heart rise into his chest. It had to be another Jason. Bruce's Jason was gone, he had died. The Jok...

Tim reached up and gripped his hair, trying to control himself. 

Jason was gone, killed by the Joker, and Tim had killed the Joker in some twisted sense of revenge. It had been for Bruce, but Jason was included in that package. 

Tim began to rock on his heels as he struggled to breathe. The voices from the computer speakers pounded into his ears.

“Jason, wait!”

“Where's the Joker?” Tim flinched. “Where is he, Bats?”

“He's gone, Jason.” The words were an ice pick through Tim's heart. He could hear the disappointment in Batman's voice. 

“Gone where? Because I sure as hell know you didn't kill him. You're just letting him hide out, plotting his next attack?”

“I'm not letting him do anything, Jason.” No, none of it had been Batman's fault. Jason had no right to blame Batman. Batman had done everything in his power to keep Gotham safe from the Joker. It just...it hadn't been enough. 

Tim cracked. “I KILLED HIM!” He fell to his knees as he half screamed, half sobbed. “I DID IT. I KILLED HIM! OH GOD!” Tim wrapped his arms around himself as he felt Alfred pull him into a hug. “Oh god, I killed him for nothing!” 

“Tim?!” Tim sobbed more as he heard Bruce's voice. The ear piece had come back to life at some point, activating the microphone.

“Hey! We are not done! Get back here, damn it!” Alfred wriggled the ear piece out of Tim's hands and muted the speakers of the computer. He pulled Tim back into his lap and hugged the young man close.

“Shh, Master Timothy. It is alright...Everything is alright.” Tim clung to Alfred and sobbed into the man's jacket. Nothing was alright. Tim had killed the Joker because Batman never could. Batman had never gotten true justice for Jason or the hundreds of lives the Joker had taken. Batman never could have gotten justice for the torture the Joker had afflicted upon Tim. 

But Jason was alive. Had the revenge, had the justice become pointless? Had Tim killed the Joker for no reason? 

Bruce, not Batman, came running to the cave, with Red Hood on his heels. Tim was still curled into Alfred's arms when they arrived, shaking and crying.

“Tim!” Alfred released his hold on Tim to Bruce and Tim curled himself into the strong arms. “Why is he down here?” 

“Who the hell is that?” Bruce's arms tightened around Tim.

“He's my son, Jason.” The simple word stirred the emotions in Tim and he began to sob again. 

“I'm so sorry, Bruce! I'm so sorry! I had to! He wasn't going to stop! I had to!”

Didn't Bruce know that? As long as the Joker was around, he was never going to stop hurting Batman. Tim had needed to protect Batman, because Batman refused to. 

“Shh, Tim. I know...I know.” Bruce scooped Tim up and Tim felt so small then. He buried his head against Bruce's shoulder. 

“I had to do it, Bruce. I'm so sorry. I had to do it for you. For Jason. For everyone.” 

“What the hell is he talking about? How does he know me?” 

“Tim was my Robin, after you.” 

“You REPLACED me?” Jason was yelling and it just made Tim sob more. “How could you just replace me?! Wait...you said was. This isn't the same kid whose in the costume now?” Tim shuddered and Bruce adjusted his hold on Tim, bringing up his cape to act as a kind of blanket. Tim knew it was really a shield. 

“Tim is no longer Robin.” Bruce squeezed Tim's shoulder at the statement, trying to give him some sort of comfort. 

“So you replaced my replacement? Why? Because he is clearly emotionally unstable?” 

“Jason! Enough! Alfred, can you please bring Tim upstairs while Jason and I talk.” Tim squirmed at the idea and shook his head. He didn't want to leave Bruce. “Tim, it is alright...Calm down.” Tim shook his head.

“What the hell is wrong with him?” 

Tim could feel Bruce begin to talk, but he needed to explain himself. He couldn't let Bruce keep lying for him. “I killed the Joker.” 

“You...what. Excuse me?” 

Tim turned his body so he could look at Jason. The man had removed his helmet and Tim felt his cheeks go hot. He'd never seen Jason's face, not really. Only ever behind the Robin mask. Bruce had no pictures of him otherwise, not that he had ever shown to Tim. “I....I killed the Joker...because he would never stop hurting Batman. Because he killed you.” 

Bruce was staring down at Tim and Tim had to keep his eyes focused on Jason, because if he looked up at Bruce, he would start crying again. 

“Tim...”

“I'm so sorry...I knew...Some part of me...I knew what I was doing, but you were already so disappointed in me...I didn't want to tell you.” 

“Tim, I was never disappointed in you.” 

“Yes, you were! That is why you took being Robin away from me!” 

“You took Robin away from him for doing what you couldn't?” 

Bruce growled and glared at Jason. “We do not need your input on this Jason. Alfred, please take Tim upstairs, now.” Tim whipped his head back to look at Bruce to protest, but stopped short. Bruce looked beyond exhausted and Tim realized everything Bruce had been through in a few short hours. Jason had returned and Tim had admitted to murder. Tim closed his mouth and allowed Bruce to set him down. He took Alfred's hand and followed him back up to the Manor. As they got to the exit, voices exploded in yelling again. 

~*~

 

Tim sat on his bed for hours, his hands wrapped around his long gone cold mug of cocoa. He felt absolutely drained of everything. All he wanted to do was sleep and, hopefully, not wake up again. He was hoping Bruce would leave him be and they would talk in the morning. If they talked at all...Tim was praying Bruce just refused to confront this, like he tended to do with emotional matters.

Luckily for Tim, Dick and Damian had not been present for his melt down, so they would not be barging into his room, at least for tonight.

But his door did swing open and it was the person Tim had least likely expected to be standing there. 

Jason came into Tim's room and closed the door behind him. He plopped himself onto the bed and narrowed his eyes at Tim. Tim sipped his cold cocoa. It was disgusting. 

“You killed the Joker?” Tim nodded behind his mug. He was too tired to get emotional. “How?”

“I shot him in the chest.” Jason's green eyes went wide. 

“You used a gun?” Tim ducked his chin and tried to explain.

“It was..The first shot only produced a stick with a 'bang!' flag. That one was aimed at Batman...” Before Tim had gained full control of himself. “The second shot turned the stick into a projectile. It hit him in the chest.” 

“Why?” 

“Why what?” Tim blinked in surprise as Jason moved. He crawled up the bed and sat himself right beside Tim, leaning back against the headboard. 

“Why'd you shoot to kill?” Tim took another sip of his cold drink as he thought over the answer. Jason, of all people, deserved the truth.

“Because he killed you. Because he was trying to make me kill Batman. Because he was using me to hurt Batman, like he had used you. Because I was tired of it all and I knew that Batman would never end it.” 

They sat in silence for a long time, before Jason wrapped one arm carefully around Tim's shoulders and pulled him into an awkward hug. “I'm proud of you, Replacement.” 

Tim felt his lips quirk into a smile. Those words were all he had ever wanted to hear, and coming from Jason, they meant the world.


End file.
